How to Get Unstuck, Amplify your Strengths & get results in your online business

Do you feel stuck in starting your business? Have you been trying to figure out what to do next but can’t seem to make any progress? Does it feel like nothing is happening – or worse, you feel like you’re getting more and more behind each day?

If so, this post will walk you through a step-by-step process on how to get unstuck, amplify your strengths and get results in your online business by stepping into your leadership power.

The Power That Controls Us

The power that stops people from moving forward, making progress, creating the life they want is not their mindset or their thoughts.

I first discovered this power one night after I put my two small kids to sleep. You could say it was my “awakening moment”.

Instead of going to clean the kitchen, as I would usually do, this time I leaned up on the living room floor.

I was exhausted. Tired from all the tasks and needs. Emotionally down, the pain from all the continuous conflicts with my husband was crashing me. Our relationship was at a breaking point.

Yet, there was the echo of giggles and unconditional love coming from my kids’ curious eyes; their joy when chasing butterflies, and the courage to climb into cupboards.

Inspired by their power to find joy in little things, I asked:

Feli, what brings you joy?

How do you want to live the rest of your life?

I had done everything I thought would bring me a good life – moved from my village, school, job, marriage, kids. But what next? Going back to my job and waiting for my kids to grow up wasn’t a good enough answer.

I felt that there was more in me.

How can I be an example for my kids? What are my strengths?

These were totally different questions that I had ever asked before. Together with a strong desire to do whatever it takes to find the answers.

Before, I was asking all the wrong questions:

What’s wrong with me?

Why is it so difficult?

Why is nobody helping me?

And I was living the answers.

The Secret Power That Unlocks Potential

I think you are wondering.

Ok, ok, Felicia, that’s great for you, but, what’s the power you are talking about? And how can this help me?

That’s exactly the power. The power to ask questions. The right questions. The empowering questions. You name them.

Questions that are different from what you would normally ask yourself.

I wasn’t aware of the power of those questions, but oh how my life started changing when I started asking them.

How is this related to an entrepreneur’s journey?

You want to put your skills and strengths to good use and make changes in your life and in the world, but mostly you’re asking questions like:

What if I don’t make it?

Is it worth it?

What if I lose my family if this works and clients take all my time?

Am I capable to handle the money and the success?

Why can’t I just do it?!

I can predict that by only reading these types of questions you can sense the energy drain and disempowerment.

Let’s start asking better questions that will actually help you get clarity, get unstuck, and get you results in your online business.

A step-by-step process.

1. Your Dream Is Not A Fantasy

We weren’t taught in school, or by our parents, how to live a fulfilled life. We’ve been taught to make a living.

How to make a living? How to earn just enough?

The answer to these questions is surviving, paycheck to paycheck. Not thriving.

That’s why back in my youth I chose to study economics instead of following my passion for psychology. I’ve let myself convinced that economics will ensure me a better living.

We’ve been raised to believe that going after our dreams and passions doesn’t pay our bills.

Also, building a business is insecure, risky, and may require sacrificing our family, health, and relationships.

This is why people don’t achieve a life of freedom, fulfillment, and impact. Not because they don’t have the ability, but because they’ve stopped considering it as an option.

They stopped asking questions, being curious, following their joy.

They’ve convinced themselves that they should be satisfied with what they’ve got. Work is hard and it’s normal to not like it.

It’s like driving our life with the default settings on, simply by asking the wrong questions.

How To Set The Right Direction

For sure, if you look around you will find people who’ve found a way to shine, to bring their own unique strengths, power to life and serve humanity.

Why is that? It’s not that they are smarter. It’s not that they are more beautiful. It’s not that they are luckier than others. It’s not that they have come up with a genius or outstanding idea.

They simply realized that they have control for the direction of their life.

They see their business creation as a reflection of themselves and not a way to prove themselves.

They stopped jumping from one cool idea to another.

They’ve aligned themselves to ONE DIRECTION, anchored in purpose and vision.

The reason I’ve been able to be so financially successful is my focus has never, ever, for one minute, been money. [...] Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life, because you become what you believe

Oprah Winfrey

But, what exactly is purpose and vision?

Let’s look first into the definitions:

Purpose: the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists.

Vision: the ability to picture and plan the future with imagination or wisdom.

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For me, I wasn’t specifically looking for my purpose or to clarify my vision. I didn’t know at the time, but this is what I started doing – asking questions to find my purpose and clarify my vision.

It was clear to me, there was no point living without understanding myself, without a true sense of meaning and direction. I was willing to do whatever it took to sort this out.

I had one year to figure it out while the kids were adapting in kindergarten. I took my journal and wrote all the things that I find an interest in, that bring me joy, that I would love more of them in my life.

I went back to my old job as a travel agent, started a parenting blog, worked on product photography, and even sold children’s books.

I even thought of becoming a cook and started cooking from Nourishing Traditions, a book with over 700 recipes. At recipe #50 I realized that I like healthy food but not so much cooking it.

How I Found My Own Direction

So what do we normally do when we are excited about something?

That’s right. We share it.

By sharing it, I started to inspire people. When friends, with tears in their eyes, started telling me after brief discussions, “Thank you, you’ve changed my life,” I realized I should not ignore it and say, “Oh, it wasn’t a big deal.”

Because it was. They stopped asking, “What should I do?” and started taking real action, changing their life for the better.

With this new awareness, I started to read more and enrolled in courses to empower my strength for helping people.

I discovered my personality structure with a tool used by NASA and top leaders. It became clear that what I thought were my weaknesses, were actually my personality traits.

It helped me to begin to understand the differences between people – how they are motivated differently, how they communicate differently, and how predictable their behavior is (but more about this in another article).

We all have a different mix of strengths and we all want different things.

Feli helped me turn my attention to what I wanted, to process everything that happened in the past and take from it the things that would help me in the future. Helped make my dream come true faster.

Manuela Murariu

The Growth Formula

If you also have a calling to help others, know that your strengths, your experiences, your struggles, and your unique way of being are valuable assets. There’s no competition in being you.

Happiness comes from progress. Progress shows up in the form of growth and in a sense of contribution.

Tony Robbins

Starting a business can be a powerful vehicle for growth and positive change in the world.

Below are some action steps to clarify your direction and set yourself on the path of growth.

A normal life is a combination of ups and downs. A life driven by purpose and vision is a life of meaning and impact.

Questions To Find Your PURPOSE

Questions To Clarify Your VISION

2. How To Package Value Transaction

Now that you’ve gained, or maybe already had, clarity around your purpose and vision, it’s time to look at the practical part of crafting a core transformational offer.

An offer, a program that packages what you already have, your strengths, and adds value to people.

I repeat, a Transformation Offer.

I see many people-oriented professionals who keep investing in different methodologies, high-paid certifications, courses they think people would appreciate as much as they do.

Yet, when it’s the time to actually help people by selling, potential customers say, “Sounds good, but I just don’t need this.”

The truth is people don’t buy coaching programs, courses, consulting, or certifications.

I can hear you say: “But I do.”

Why do professionals easily pay for a single certification that costs $5000, $3000, or tens more?

They pay for a SKILL that they believe will help them create a bigger impact, get more money and make a better life for themselves and others.

They actually picture themselves doing more, being more, and creating more. They attach a visible outcome to it.

This was a huge change for me, to understand that what I have to offer aren’t tools that successful people, astronauts, and presidents use. What I have to offer is a transformative process that takes people to their desired outcome.

Let’s dig deeper into this.

The Philosophy Of Offer Creation

Clients (even you or me) are not making DECISIONS to work with someone, to buy a program or whatever. They care about themselves.

They don’t care about the program, or skills, or certificates. They care about the better life they will obtain after the program is finished.

A few months back I moved from Romania to Spain, Tenerife.

When I boarded the plane to fly to a new exotic destination, I wasn’t at all interested in the airplane’s capacity, or its engine power.

All I knew is that I bought a trusty solution to take me from point A to point B, which was a six-hour journey in as comfortable as an airplane can be.

My end goal was the destination. How I will enjoy the new environment.

At this point, let me just say that not everybody is ready to commit to a transformational journey even if they dream about it for years and years.

At the beginning of my journey, my enthusiasm was so great that I was trying to help everybody.

Only, one day when a friend came to visit and she told me before she left that she was happy I hadn’t asked her one of “those” questions.

That was a great lesson. The right people are eager to pay tremendously because they see the outcome of what you have to offer. Others can get offended, even if it’s free. Even if you just want to help.

On a side note, for me this it’s a lifestyle. So yeah, if we meet, expect genuine and curious questions about your dreams, your progress, your resources.

Getting back to what I was saying…

The right people are the ones with clear motivation to move from where they are (Point A) to a destination they desire (Point B).

You are not going to convince people who are happy where they are or want to go skiing in Austria to take your vehicle, your offer, and land in Tenerife. They won’t be happy, and neither will you.

Clarifying what your potential client wants and showing them the opportunity to achieve it by accessing your offer, makes business much simpler than you would think.

Create Your Own Transformational Offer

A Transformational Offer is when you take the right people from Point A to Point B.

For example:
Taking a couple who are getting in conflicts daily, are stressed, constantly putting down each other, and are on the point of breaking up (Point A)

To getting into manageable conflicts once a week, where they have developed skills to listen, understand the different needs, and empower each other (Point B).

Or taking my case, someone who wants to start an online business.

Before working with me is confused about what to do, overworked, freezing up with too many things to cover, and is spinning the wheels (Point A)

To clarity in the next actions that will bring the best results. Certainty in the process, clear focus, and strategies. (Point B).

Because the real transaction is not about passing money from one to the other, from one account to another.

The real transaction in the non-monetary exchange. It is the exchange of VALUE.

Let’s look at the most obvious example…

Even people who struggle with money are willing to pay way more $$ on an iPhone.

They see it as a win-win equation.  

They aren’t buying a phone to make calls.  They exchanged money for social recognition, cool photos… and they definitely feel they’ve got a good deal.

When creating your offer be aware of the value you create – freedom, inspiration, skills that erase friction and conflicts, recognition, or confidence.

The real transaction is in feelings. A win-win exchange of feelings. Not on passing money from one bank account to another. Don’t shrink your offer to fit the budget. Always Expand Value.

The real transaction is in feelings. A win-win exchange of feelings.

Don’t shrink your offer to fit the budget. Always expand value.

Below, I have added some clarifying questions to help you align yourself with the people you can serve best, create a transformational offer, and formulate a statement that easily describes what you are doing.

Questions To Find Your People

Questions To Clarify Your Attractive Offer

How To Communicate What You Are Doing

3. Give More and Make More

Now that you’ve aligned yourself with the people you want to serve best and crafted a transformational offer, what’s next?

You need to attract and help the people you want to serve into clients. How do you do this?

By creating valuable content that helps people solve their problems and gets them closer to what they want.

As you may notice, people are connecting with each other on different social media platforms.

What you have to do is choose one or two social platforms you like (not on all!), or where your people are hanging out, and start adding value.

Like this free material, which I have put serious thinking and time into so that I can add real value to someone’s life.

It’s at this point where most entrepreneurs get stuck.

When I first started creating content, my brain would freeze. I used to sit in front of my laptop and instead of creating, I ended up consuming what others had created.

Finally, after getting frustrated because time was passing, and I had nothing to show by the end of the day, I would hide behind a nice quote, a cute picture or bluntly sharing information.

The results were hearts from uncles and lost friends…

For sure, I was feeling fearful and I didn’t know how to create content.

Content that connects with the right people by taking a problem that is on their mind and offering them a solution or another perspective for how to look at things.

The truth is that we were raised and conditioned to think that we need to behave in a likeable way and not make mistakes. Otherwise we may be criticized, laughed at or even rejected.

But look, now I am learning Spanish. Does it mean that I am not good enough because I’m not fluent?

No. I am speaking as much as I know in the real world – at the market, at the restaurant and with friends. I am not hiding until I’m fluent. I show up. It’s part of the process.

It’s the same with creating content. Write. Record. Learn some more. Publish. Repeat.

A question to ask yourself daily and deliver on is:

What can I give my ideal clients that would contribute to solving their pains or getting them closer to their desires and aspirations?

You may also think that others are so much better or that the world doesn’t need one more coach, one more marketer, teacher or so on.

What’s sure is that the world needs YOU. As we’ve already agreed, you have your story and your gifts that have no competition. So, what is it you are going to do?!

What we did together, I immediately put it in action and I’m of use to people. I am relaxed and my confidence keeps growing.

Diana Savei

We’ve also been conditioned to think that talking to strangers is bad and that selling is sleazy. One of the main things I hear from some of my clients are hindering thoughts like, “I don’t know how to sell”, “I am not good at selling”, “I don’t like selling.”

Does that mean you give up on your dream of helping others? Nope. You didn’t just magically one day start running! You started step by step, and you kept going.

The same is with selling too. Anyway, it’s easier when you first bring real value to people and help them upfront. They will start asking if they can work with you.

Because they feel you have understood them and know how to take them to where they want to go.

You’ve started a business because you genuinely care, because we grow together as a system.

Here are some ideas on types of content to start with.

Educational Content

Positions you as an expert because you pinpoint the problems and also show that there is a solution.

Storytelling Content

Build authentic relationships and connections with people by sharing insights from your own journey. You show up as a human being.

Inspirational Content

Inspires people to take action, to step outside of their comfort zone to build their desired life.

Sales Content

Informs about your offer, what you are selling, what’s the process and the promised outcome.

4. Keep Up The Momentum

As you can see, we’ve been through a series of questions together that bring more clarity on starting and building your online business.

Still sometimes we think we just need someone to tell us exactly what to do.

Or do we?

The problem is usually people jump with the “perfect” answers to the wrong questions.

How many times have you given a great advice, and all you heard back was:

Yes but… I have tried a similar thing before and it doesn’t work.
Yes, but my situation is different…
Yes but… That definitely won’t apply to me.
Yes but… I don’t feel confident to do this. Easier said than done!
and on and on.

People don’t resist change, they resist being changed. People are capable, creative, resourceful beings who are able to solve their problems.

Yes, we need information that answers to your right question. You don’t just need more random information.

Change starts with changing the questions.

When you answer empowering questions, you can sense the internal alignment, the confidence, the clear action steps and results will follow.

Questions that reveal resources, that explore possibilities. Not blaming or pointing out the mistakes.

The best learning is the one that answers and adds to your current progress.

Learning it’s not consuming what everybody’s consuming such as noisy social media or news, because you will achieve what everybody else is achieving. Simply said, you can easily get lost and stuck.

Learning is a customized experience of what you need according to where you’re heading. The straight way to cut through chaos and reaction to what others want or expect from you. Cutting through jumping from one thing to another. Your Jumping On Your Own Path.

Through reading, investing in coaching, doing online courses and being around people who are ahead of you, are the enriching investments that pay back dividends for life.

Nothing in your life or business will ever be more valuable than your practice of answering empowering questions – what you want, or what you can do that is in your control or within your influence.

Questions To Empower Yourself

And one more question that I love in the morning:

What would you like to act on today to make it a successful day? Suppose you do, what benefits will it bring you? For others?

I hope this article has given you some insight to how your brain works and what it takes for you to get unstuck, amplify your strengths and get results in your online business.

Right now, I am wondering

“What’s the question you need to answer to sky-rocket your world?!”

To your best!
Felicia Boka

PS. If you want to fast-track your growth, level up your leadership skills, then learn more about Switch Leadership and let’s jump in a call ASAP.

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